Before You React: How Nonprofit Women Leaders Can Stay Grounded and In Control

Nonprofit Leadership is Tough! Here's How Women Leaders Can Stay Grounded

Let me start with a story...

As I sat at my desk, I was fuming. She had done it again! She had tried to undermine my leadership in the meeting, throwing out a comment designed to make me look like I didn't know what I was doing. And what did I do? I shot back. It wasn't one of my finer moments‍ , and I immediately regretted it.

Fast forward a few months, and once again, I was face-to-face with this team member who wasn't happy with the way I was leading. And the truth was, she had a point. We were all stretched thin, struggling to keep up with demands, putting out fires, and trying to meet the needs of our clients. Change was coming, but it was taking time.

When she tried to throw me under the bus this time, I PAUSED and took a deep breath ‍ I had prepared for this moment. I knew it and many others like it would come. During my self-reflection time, I had PONDERED about the type of leader I wanted to be. As a result of that thinking time, I had already decided that when it did, I wanted to respond with a measured, clear response.

So this time, when the pointed comment came, I was ready to respond with intention. I thanked her for her input, validated what she was saying, and clarified where we were in the process of improving support and creating manageable workloads. I kept my cool. And I felt so much better. 
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Self-Reflection is Key to Character Development

I was able to do this because I had done the self-reflective work required to lead with strength. And when the moment came, I used my CHOICE POINT to decide how I wanted to show up as a leader.

Leadership is full of choice points—moments where we can either react automatically or pause long enough to make a decision that aligns with the leader we truly want to be.

Too often, we race through these moments, stuck in survival mode, firefighting the next crisis, or defaulting to old habits. But here's the truth

"Engaging in self-reflection allows you to slow down and recognize your choice points, or opportunities to make decisions, and then make choices in a way that feels more aligned with who you are and who you are becoming."
Character Driven Leadership for Women

️I've seen this time and time again with the women I coach. Those who create the habit of self-reflection—who PAUSE before they PROCEED, become the leaders others trust, respect, and follow.
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The Power of a Choice Point

Let me introduce you to Jessica. She was dreading a tough conversation with a staff member. She had been overthinking it for days, losing sleep, replaying worst-case scenarios in her mind. She worried about how the person would react, how she might get defensive, or worse, what if Jessica lost her composure and became flustered or even started crying.

But instead of letting the anxiety dictate her leadership, she chose a different path. She PAUSED

She asked herself:

• What kind of leader do I want to be in this moment?
• How do I want to feel after this conversation?
• What would my most authentic, confident self do?

With this clarity, she went into the conversation grounded, composed, and clear in her message. She didn't just get through it. She handled it in a way that strengthened trust and accountability with her employees.

Why This Matters for You

I know Jessica, and I are not the only ones who have been in a situation like this. Maybe you've had moments where you reacted in a way you later regretted. Or times when you wished you had handled a conversation with more clarity, confidence, or composure.

Self-reflection isn't about dwelling on the past. It's about actively shaping your leadership character by choosing how you show up. It's about recognizing that every challenge, every tense meeting, and every difficult conversation is a CHOICE POINT is an opportunity to decide the kind of leader you want to be.

"Decisions build our character, and we make our best character-driven decisions by pausing and pondering. "
Character Driven Leadership

That's exactly what I guide you through in my new book, Character Driven Leadership for Women. I introduce the Infinite Leadership Loop, a process designed to help you pause, reflect, and make decisions that strengthen your leadership, build trust with your team, and align your actions with your values.

This book isn't just about leadership strategies. It's about becoming the leader you were meant to be.
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Your Next Choice Point

Right now, you have a choice:

You can keep leading on autopilot—feeling stuck in old patterns, constantly reacting to the chaos, never quite feeling in control.

Or you can choose to lead differently...
... with clarity, intention, and the confidence that comes from knowing you're making the best decisions, aligned with your values and the leader you aspire to be.

 Which choice will you make?

~ Kathy 
Do the inner work. It's worth it!

P. S. If you want to go deeper with a space to practice this work with support, join me inside The Training Library. It's where we take these ideas and make them real in your day-to-day leadership.
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​Ready to Lead with Confidence and Impact?

The nonprofit sector doesn't always give women leaders the support and training they deserve—but that's not your fault.

I've been where you are, juggling leadership demands while trying to find balance and confidence. I created The Training Library to provide nonprofit leaders like you with practical, on-demand courses and personalized coaching, all within reach.

It's like having a trusted mentor in your corner, guiding you through every challenge.
No more second-guessing. No more struggling alone.

Inside The Training Library, you'll gain the skills and confidence to lead with ease, balance, and impact—so you can thrive at work and in life.
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Master Nonprofit Leadership—With Training, You Can Trust.
Join The Training Library today and take the first step toward confident leadership.