The way I see it, when you're in a job that you hate, you have two choices:
1) Get out
2) Work your butt off to turn things positive despite how impossible that seems. And it probably does seem impossible. I get that.
Some work situations are remarkably nasty
Many people are in utterly difficult situations. Bullying, harassment, extreme negativity and caustic environments seem to be the norm for many. I have calls with clients who are working with someone who degrades them, plays head games on a regular basis or attacks their character. Other clients experience this lower level of constant adversity.
Don't get stuck in feeling trapped
If you are not consciously choosing to stay, you will feel trapped. You will feel stuck. And you will feel like a victim. When you shift it ever so slightly to dealing with what you have, you can also make some choices around how you deal with it.
When you choose to stay, make it a conscious choice
If you choose to stay and remember the word is choose, be clear that it is your choice. I know there are consequences to leaving. I totally get that. But be clear there are options. You are taking the "easier" route, the one that seems less challenging, perhaps. Or you are choosing the option that will, in your mind, takes better care of your other needs like family and finances. Whatever the reason is that you are choosing to stay, just get clear that you are choosing.
Your work environment won't change - You have to
If you want to have a different experience at work, then you have work to do. It's not going to change. And honestly, you're not going to change it. Your boss is who they are. The contractor is who they are. So are your co-workers. You don't have control over them.
Keep reading though...
What you can change is...
...the way you see other things. You can change the way you experience your job. You can change the way you respond to the things that happen in your job. In doing all of those things maybe, just maybe, the culture will change. And maybe it won't. But your experience of it will change dramatically!
This requires intense discipline from you to do that continuously. Otherwise, you will get sucked into the cesspool that is there.
Make a choice
Are you leaving or are you staying? If you're staying then, be prepared for the fight of your life. The lessons you learn and the impacts on the rest of your life might just make it worth it.
Get some help
This is extremely tough work, and you will need a team of heroes on your side.
Leaving or staying is a choice
Be conscious about your choice and work within that choice to change your experience.
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Women leaders often hit a point where they find themselves in over their heads and wondering if they have what it takes to lead.