KATHY ARCHER
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Your job as a leader is to do more than survive each day.

31/10/2018

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Your job as a leader is to do more than survive each day. I know, that sounds crazy. You're probably saying, Kathy, my only goal is to get through today! My guess is you get up many mornings and say a little prayer: "God, just get me through this day, this meeting, this trip...."
You were not meant just to survive leadership and life. You ARE meant to thrive! ​
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Yes, some days will be tough, in fact, many days will be difficult, stressful and downright ugly! I am sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but that's part of life. Struggle, suffering and stress will never go away. What you can change, is how you interact with struggle, suffering and stress.

We need to relax, renew and recharge
See, here's the thing. Good times, easy days and carefree moments don't develop you. The relax, renew and recharge you. They are necessary, but they don't develop you. We need to grow and develop:Think of a diamond. It comes into being because of the pressure it experiences.The same is true with a pearl. It is the constant friction that polishes it. The pressure you are under, the constant friction you experience, is what is creating you...your character.

We need to focus on who we are and who we are becoming:
It is how you choose to respond (not react) to struggle, suffering and stress that creates both:
  • The type of woman you are and the impact you have
  • The kind of woman you are becoming and the legacy you will leave

It's all about ....growing your character
When you move into thriving, you are consciously developing (rather than leaving it up to chance) your character. Character development (yours) is the subject of the book I am working on. This quick overview of the book will give you a head start on developing your character.
What is character?
The unique combination of your qualities, values and traits that make you, you.

 Why is character important? 
When you are aligned with those unique qualities, you feel good and do great work. When you don't, you feel crappy, and work becomes hard.

Why we struggle to lead with our strong character traits:
  • First, because we've never taken the time to get to know ourselves really.
  • Second, because what we see about ourselves we don't always like or think is helpful, useful or right, so we push away from it looking to find a better way.
  • Third, because we tend to avoid inner work, reflective processes and anything that might take us out of our comfort zone.
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How is character developed?
By identifying who you are and who you are becoming and then spending a lifetime accepting that and cultivating that.
  • Initially, it is about becoming aware of your values, ethics, morales, skills, talents, and traits and learning to live in alignment with them, so you feel matched with who you are rather than continually being "out of character."
  • Then, it is about looking at the impact you want to have on others and the difference you want to make in the world. That vision helps you to determine what parts of your current character will help you do that. It will also identify new or different character traits, values, ethics and morals you will need to strengthen, grow or develop.
Steps for developing your character.
  1. Increase your awareness of the language of character development.
  2. Get to know yourself
    1. Your character strengths.
    2. Your values, ethics and morals.
    3. Your vision for impact and legacy in your family, organization and community.
  3. Create a plan
    1. Find mentors, role models, teachers and supports.
    2. Build a system of ongoing reflection, feedback, practice and then more reflection, feedback and practice.
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You don't have just to survive every day my dear! You can thrive in both your leadership and your life! You get to choose! What choice do you make today? If you want to discover how other women are doing this, listen into this video series about cultivating your character. 6 women, talk about what it's like to cultivate character as a woman leader. You'll find so much value and practical advice. Tune in here the Cultivating Your Character Video Series
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How to lead with Humanity

15/10/2018

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This week I unpack the virtue of humanity
Humanity describes strengths that manifest in caring relationships with others. You know, being human in leadership! We are kind of like robots. We focus so much on the tasks and only focus on relationship when we have time. 
Humanity is needed! 
These traits are interpersonal and are mostly relevant in one-on-one relationships.
Humanity covers the character traits of
  • social intelligence
  • love (think compassion)
  • kindness
Tune in to understand how you can practice living with the virtue of humanity
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Watch this training on YouTube here

LINKS FROM TODAY’S SESSION

  • Join the CULTIVATING YOUR CHARACTER FORMUM
  • Join the CONFIDENT WOMEN LEADERS COMMUNITY
  • Grab this week’s Guidesheet  THE VIRTUES OF HUMANITY
  • Grab this week’s Guidesheet YOUR SIGNATURE STRENGTHS
  • Create your plan to get out of Survival Mode
 
  • Find MY BOOK -  Mastering Confidence: Discover your leadership potential by awakening your inner guidance system
    • On AMAZON
    • On Audible → 
    • Listen to it on ITunes
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3 ways to make your social media time make you feel better

11/10/2018

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Do you hit "Like" when you see a good post? Do you share some that really move you? Me too! I love ones that just stand out in the newsfeed. 
  • One about a more compassionate world has me wishfully thinking; If only people would be more compassionate!
  • A post about gratitude reminds me to be grateful for my family.
  • Seeing someone share a post about big dreams gives me a quick boost of confidence.
I share images like this in my Instagram and Facebook feeds. These images make people feel good. That's why we come to social media - to wash away the pain of the day. ​
We skim, scroll and scan through our news feed 
looking to feel better.

Here's the catch. It's a quick high that doesn't last.
When we flip through our social media accounts, we look at the world through blurry eyes...not really seeing people or our role in it. 
What's more, we look at it and say, "Yeah...
  • If only the world would do more of that. 
  • If only so and so read this and took note. 
  • If only my schedule would let me feel that way or do that more.
Wistfully after a few minutes, we move away 
from the newsfeed and back to reality. 

Nothing's changed.
Re-read those three comments in italics above again.
Did you notice anything? They all they blame out there....on someone else, the world or a lack of time. We are in victim mode when we see them and feel like we can't have that. That victim mode is why we head back to work, unchanged. 

It's because we have not taken responsibility for change. Instead, we need to see the posts and ask what the message or lesson for ourselves in it:
  • How can I be more compassionate to that team member at work who's driving me crazy?
  • What am I grateful for about this overwhelming challenge I have to face today?
  • What specific steps, even if they are tiny, can I take today towards achieving that goal that I so badly want, but struggle to move forward on?
Take the inspiration and message and the post and turn it back to yourself. Take responsibility for applying what you've learned. Indifferent skimming, scrolling and scanning are no different than numbing yourself out in front of the TV. It's passive. 

3 ways to make your social media time make you feel better:
  1. When you catch yourself mindlessly skimming, STOP! Walk away from the phone or computer!
  2. If a post catches your attention, STOP and let a post sink in before moving to the next one. 
  3. Make your share more meaningful by STOPPING and adding a comment about why you are sharing this. 
Your thumb needs a break. Stop more often when you are on social media, and you feel way better ;-) Make your social media experience active rather than passive. 

When we look at social media posts and flip them back to action we can take in the moment, social media has the power to change our experience and that of those around us.
Ask this question
So next time you see a post that moves you, ask yourself:

How can I apply this message or lesson in my leadership today?

Today's commentary has been brought to you by tomorrow's WEBINAR: 
Character Development Planning 101

It's not what you DO as a leader, it's the type of person your are BEING when you lead. 
Your Character Development doesn't happen by chance! You need to be intentional about it! Start by creating your Character Development Plan.
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  • Home
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