Note: This article first appeared on Charity Village Walking into a boardroom and averting your eyes as your stomach clenches is a horrible feeling. When you are worried about what you need to say and how you will say it, you begin to agonize. The doubt creeps in. Others in the room intuitively sense your inner hesitancies. This uncertainty spells disaster. Now paint a different picture. Imagine entering the room with poised posture. Sense within you the assurance of your abilities and certainty that you can handle what might come your way. Others may not be able to put their finger on it. However, you know they are aware of something about you. It is your confidence. Confidence isn’t something handed to you. It is not a skill that can be taught. Confidence comes from within. Confidence is part wise elder and part courageous warrior. Your confidence grows as you gain wisdom and then apply that understanding to experiences, events, and relationships. Self-confidence develops when you internalize the lessons and insightfully apply your learning in the future. Years ago, I yelled at my administrative support. We were young. I’d just received a promotion into one of my first leadership positions. This lady and I went from co-workers to me supervising her. Instead of allies, we became opponents. We spent a lot of time vying to be right. Shouting at her to show me respect did much more to tarnish my reputation then it did to nurture it. As a result of that exchange, I reprimanded myself for being inept and unprofessional. I realized if I wanted to be the leader I desired, I needed to seek mentorship. I reached out to respected leaders for insights. In doing so, I was able to address tough conversations with increasing skill. As a leader, I courageously stepped into no end of difficult discussions. As a result, I gained confidence. It was through my applied learning and my willingness to take risks that I become more adept and bold about doing the work that needed to be done. Boldly engaging in those situations helped me to mature and strengthened our team. Confidence grows when you further your knowledge and expose yourself to new situations. To thrive as a leader, you will need to establish habits that cultivate learning. You must challenge yourself to move beyond what is comfortable. Establish these three are three habits to foster increased confidence.Tackle tasks you are avoiding. What we are skirting around is often the thing that will advance us the most. Heck yes, it may be tough. Absolutely, you may not want to do it or maybe you don't even know how to do it. But the fact that you have been dodging it is a huge clue that it is something you might want to challenge yourself with. To identify the task you have been avoiding requires you to take a few moments each day of reflection.
Do something outside of your comfort zone daily. We like our beloved coffee. We have a favorite pair of shoes. We take the same route to work each day. It’s comfortable. It doesn’t require thought. Routine is important. Equally imperative in growing yourself as a leader is taking risks. The more often you leave the security of what you know, the larger your zone of comfort becomes. You didn’t know the people you worked with when you started. Over time, you’ve learned more about them and now have a relationship with them. The first time you picked up a cell phone it was strange. Now you use it every day. Learning a new task or skill requires a place of not knowing how first. But going there is where you learn.
Spend 15 minutes a day learning something new. We are most afraid of what we don't know. It's time to change that. Make the unknown familiar. The greatest leaders are readers. The most impactful people have within them a wealth of knowledge. The most confident people have a storehouse of experiences, stories, and knowledge. To increase your confidence, you will need to learn. The more you learn through courses, books and videos, the more you can tackle different situations in different ways.
Increasing your confidence requires you to gain knowledge and step outside your comfort zone. Feed the wise elder within your and cheer on the courageous warrior. Together they will develop the confidence you desire and need to become the incredible leader you were born to be.
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Practice is for kids learning to play the piano, master the play in the end zone or Olympic athletes.
Right? Yes....AND... practice is for you too! But what do you need to practice so you feel more capable, competent and confident? Ah…I’ll tell you that little nugget on this week’s FB live session AND I’ll give you a way to quickly add it to your already busy day!
LINKS from today's session
MASTERING CONFIDENCE INTENSIVE - 8-week online program Join the CONFIDENT WOMEN LEADER'S group here Find your Guide Sheet - Apprentice to Master Find MY BOOK - Mastering Confidence: Discover your leadership potential by awakening your inner guidance system
Most people don’t come out and say they want more confidence. They say things like:
* Communication is a big challenge for me * I am struggling to address concerns/issues with staff or my boss * I don’t feel like I have enough experience/training to do my job * I feel like an imposter * I struggle to be taken seriously as a competent leader All of these boil down to wanting to grow your confidence. When you watch this session, you will learn 3 Lil’ Secrets to Grow Your Confidence!
LINKS from today's session
MASTERING CONFIDENCE INTENSIVE - 8-week online program Join the CONFIDENT WOMEN LEADER'S group here Find your GUIDE SHEET # 8 - Changing Your Mind Chatter Find MY BOOK - Mastering Confidence: Discover your leadership potential by awakening your inner guidance system
There is one word you should NOT use when you are giving your staff feedback, praise or encouragement.
You may already have an idea what it is...but what do you use instead? You’ll learn that, when you watch this FB Live session:
LINKS from today's session
Listen to the beginning of MASTERING CONFIDENCE here Find your GUIDE SHEET #27 - Create your powerful vision + Chapter from Mastering Confidence MASTERING CONFIDENCE INTENSIVE - Join the 8-week online program Join the CONFIDENT WOMEN LEADERS Group here You'll be a better nonprofit leader when you listen to audio books!You want to enjoy leadership more, find you are making a greater difference, feel happier and more satisfied in life and rid yourself of a bit of the daily turmoil you feel. Doesn’t that pretty much sum up what most leaders are looking for? Perhaps you also want a little more love, a smaller waistline, and an increase in your bank account. That’s not a bad list of desires. Striving for more is a good thing. Yes, we need to be grateful for what we have, but a healthy determination to continue to grow, figure out the next challenge and navigate our way to a greater sense of peace in work and life is really the essence of aging. New insights lead to growth Learning from our mistakes, failures, and setbacks, as well as our achievements, wins and successes, happens best when we gain new information that challenges our current way of thinking and behaving. The different material assists us in finding fresh strategies, adjusting our actions or shifting our mindsets to get improved results. At other times, the insights we gain affirm we are on the right path. One way to get new ideas to challenge your assumptions, perspectives, and values is to read. But who has time to read? Let’s boil it down to some basic truths about leadership, learning, and life.
The Audible Secret I discovered Audible a few years ago when I was in a program that made reading the forefront. There was no way I could find the time to fit the required reading in. I downloaded the books to Audible and listened my way through them. What I realized was that I’ve always listened to books. From the Steven Covey 7 Habits of Highly Effective People cassette tapes to the David Allen time management revolution Getting Things Done CDs boxed set. I’ve been a listener for years and years. I used to borrow audio CDs from the library to take them on business trips so I could drive and learn. Now, I still borrow some audiobooks from the library, but most often, I use Audible. I think you should too! Let me tell you why you need an Audible account and how easy it is to use. The Audible Story Here is what you need to know about Audible:
But how does Audible really work?
You may be wondering, if I can’t find time to read, how would I find time to listen to books? That is easy! You just play it while you….. 10 times in your day when you can listen to an audiobook
Need some ideas about what books to download? Grab this guide that I made for you with my 20 favourite leadership books to listen to. There you have it. Grab your Audible membership today. Begin listening to leadership books to grow and develop yourself, a financial book to help you increase your bank account, healthy living authors who will share their wisdom about weight loss and, of course, one particular leadership coach who gives you a system to Master your Confidence. That way, you will move from surviving to thriving in both your leadership and your life!
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