Kathy's Blog

Lead with Confidence - Get Grittier - 4 Ways to help you

12/1/2016

Grittier people achieve more. That’s a fact.

The pioneers that didn’t have guts, determination and persistence; didn’t survive.
The athletes that don’t have the resolve to stick it out despite failures; never make it to the Olympics.
Business owners that aren’t willing to ride the waves over the long haul, with the courage to face their fears; lose their shirts.

Leaders who aren’t gritty; simply don’t make it.

Leadership isn’t an easy journey
There are many hurdles along the way. Leaders that survive these challenges learn from their experiences and incorporate the lessons moving forward. They stick it out. They get back up again and again after they fall. They succeed, not because they were lucky, blessed, or had people on their side. It’s because they had grit.

4 ways to increase your leadership grit:

1) Increase Your Courage
One key trait of truly successful leaders is they have an air of confidence. They are self-assured. That did not come from hanging out in their comfort zone. Leaders get that level of confidence by being brave. They become more confident by courageously doing things that were uncomfortable, awkward and yes, even scary.

Confidence and courage go hand in hand.
The more you be courageous, the more confidence you’ll have. The more confidence you have, the more courage you will have to do new things that grow you and your team.

Take Action:
Lean into discomfort. Try new things. Ask yourself, “If I wasn’t scared, what would I do?” then do it!

That might be taking a course, asking your boss for a day off, or having a difficult conversation with an employee. Don’t avoid things because they are uncomfortable. Lean into the fear.

2) Strengthen your willpower
The question isn’t Can you? It is Will you?
The ability to say, “I will do this” and mean it AND then go and do it is the ultimate weapon in your arsenal. Wishing, planning and even stating are all good, but without action. You won’t get anywhere.

Willpower is best defined by Kelly McGonigal
It is your ability to make choices that are consistent with you biggest goals and your highest values, even when some part of you doesn’t want to. It is the ability to remember what matters most even when there are distractions AND the willingness to support these goals even when self-doubt is present when you have cravings when you were experiencing physical pain or anxiety.
Crazy stuff eh?

Two things you need to know about strengthening your willpower.

1) Willpower is finite.
You start the day out with a certain amount of willpower, and you use willpower up every time you make a decision.

What you will have for breakfast.
What you will wear.
Which route you will take to work etc.

That is why we end up with decision fatigue. Meaning after making so many decisions throughout our work day, we don’t have the willpower to make healthy decisions about what to eat for supper or to get ourselves to bed early to get a good sleep.
2) You can earn more willpower
By eating healthy snacks and meals throughout your day and intermittent exercise, you can acquire more willpower. Here is the science behind that concept.

Take Action:

Develop habits and routines so you don't have to make so many decisions.
Focus on the fundamentals: Eat healthy, get enough sleep and move your body.

3) Fight Resistance
Resistance shows up in your day as

fear
doubt
procrastination
perfectionism
distraction and
withdrawal.

These are the gremlins that interfere with our ability to get things done, especially the meaningful things that you want to do.

To fight resistance:
you first need to increase your awareness to what is happening for you. Then, develop habits that help you move through it, using your willpower, to get done what is important to get done.

This is what it looks like in action:
When you take the time to review your daily to-do items and start to notice that “talking to John” has shown up for a week straight, you can ask yourself some questions about that that.

Is it really important? Yes.
Have I doubted my ability to handle that conversation? Perhaps.
Have I been allowing other things to distract me from that important conversation? Um…yup!

The gritty plan:
Then, lean into the discomfort (aka – grab some courage) deal with it first thing in your day when your willpower is strong and have the conversation. Yes, you might mess it up. It may not go quite the way you planned. But a gritty person, notices failures. They see what they can learn from them. Then, a gritty person applies that lesson next time around, with more confidence.

Take Action:
lean into the discomfort (aka – grab some courage) deal with it first thing in your day when your willpower is strong and have the conversation. Yes, you might mess it up. It may not go quite the way you planned. But a gritty person, notices failures. They see what they can learn from them. Then, a gritty person applies that lesson next time around, with more confidence.

4) Ignite your passion
Passion is the burning desire in you. It’s connected to purpose. It is why we do the work we do. It’s why we get so frustrated that we never get the stuff done that we really wanted to get done. It fires us up.

Pay attention to your body
You can figure out what you are passionate about by noticing your body. When do you get excited, angry or eager? What makes you speak up or speak out? When do you lean into conversations? What kinds of things spur you to action? All of those are indicators of your passion.

Do more of what lights you up.
When you are deeply passionate about your work, you’ll find it easier to get through challenges and tough times.

Take Action:
Do more of what lights you up.
When you are deeply passionate about your work, you’ll find it easier to get through challenges and tough times.

Enhancing your grit makes you more successful
Grittier leaders take organizations further and do more meaningful work. Employees are engaged and excited about the work they do. Enhance your grit, by growing your courage, strengthening your willpower, fighting resistance and igniting your passion. These 4 strategies will find you enjoying your job more and feeling more fulfilled (as opposed to ragged) at the end of your day.

Kathy is a leadership coach for women who want to strengthen their leadership and find balance in life. She mentors females as they rediscover their purpose, passion and persistence for life while dealing with office politics, jerk bosses and the challenges of family life. In her signature program Women with Grit: Leading with Courage & Confidence, Kathy gives her ladies the hope and inspiration they need along with a kick in the pants to make positive change in their lives.