KATHY ARCHER
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Are you caught in this painful trap?

28/6/2017

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​Are you willingly suffering? It’s the trap that Martyrs get into. Martyrs sit and wait for things to change, all the while stewing and complaining about it. In many ways, martyr’s are postponing their life, waiting and waiting for something to happen. All the while, they are also feeling powerless to do anything about the things going on that they aren’t so happy about. It's quite painful, depressing and draining. 
​Martyrs sit and wait. Leader’s, on the other hand, get their butts in gear and start making the change.
More on that in a moment!
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Are you a martyr?
Take a gander at these phrases and see if any of them sound familiar:
  • I’ll just wait and see how it goes.
  • As soon as X happens, things will change.
  • When X changes, things will be different.
  • After X event/meeting/project, the atmosphere will shift.
​You've given away your power
These thoughts or comments are all signs you’ve given up any hope of you being able to make a difference. What that means is that you’ve given your power to someone else, or to the situation. What you are left with is the frustration about the situation that you don’t believe you can control. Reacting as a victim of the situation can often lead to complaining, venting, and gossiping about it to those around you. Sadly it also leaves you with immense internal frustration, turmoil, and suffering. Either way you look at it, it sucks!
 
Take your power back
What you may not realize, my dear, is the way you experience what seem like crappy circumstances, is a choice. I know it doesn’t feel like it sometimes. But it is a choice in how you chose to see it, think about it and your response to it.
 
The truth is, Leaders chose to respond differently.

​Martyrs sit and wait. Leaders, get their butts in gear and start making changes.
Leaders take action
​Leader’s don’t get caught in the trap of being a victim of their circumstances. Whatever the situation, they choose to see it in a way that puts some of the power back in their hands. They pause and ponder. Getting clear on what’s going on, they set a vision and clear goals. Knowing what they want, they go after it with intentional action.
 
Take a lesson from these gals
Let me give you some examples from a few ladies in history that demonstrate how they chose to lead their lives rather than be a victim of their circumstances.  
​“Although the world is full of suffering, it is full also of the overcoming of it.” 
Helen Keller
 
“In the long run, we shape our lives, and we shape ourselves. The process never ends until we die. And the choices we make are ultimately our own responsibility.”
Eleanor Roosevelt
 
“You are where you are in life because of what you believe is possible for yourself.” 
Oprah Winfrey
 
“I attribute my success to this – I never gave or took any excuse.”
Florence Nightingale
 
Vowing, even intense vowing, is often useless. The next day comes and the next day goes. What works is making a vivid, concrete plan. 
Carol Dweck
​Martyrs sit and wait. Leaders, get their butts in gear and start making changes.
​Here is what I want to know
So my question to you my dear, is this: Are you done with being a martyr?
  • Are you ready to step into taking control of your situation?
  • Are you ready to lead?
Remember, Leaders get their butts in gear and start making changes. So...if you are done being a martyr...start being a leader.
 
Get your butt in gear, and make a decision right now, to take back control of your life. Decide to be intentional about creating a plan to change things. Here are 3 places for you to get some help with that
  
The 5 mistakes women make when trying to change their lives
Discover your leadership potential by awakening your inner guidance system
Create your Blueprint for Change
​Martyrs sit and wait. Leaders, get their butts in gear and start making changes.

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Kathy is a leadership coach for women who want to strengthen their leadership & find balance in life. 
She mentors women as they rediscover their purpose, passion, and persistence for life while dealing with office politics, jerk bosses and the challenges of family life. Kathy gives her ladies the hope and inspiration they need along with a kick in the pants to make positive changes in their lives. ​​​​​​​

Discover more in Kathy’s book 
Mastering Confidence: Discover Your Leadership Potential by Awakening Your Inner Guidance System ​​​​​​
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    Kathy Archer

    Women leaders often hit a point where they find themselves in over their heads and wondering if they have what it takes to lead.
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    ​In my online courses and coaching I teach them inner and outer tools to restore their lost confidence so they can move from surviving to thriving in both leadership and life.

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