Don't let them see you sweat & other falsehoods - 3 WAYS TO INCREASE YOUR EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE
Do not, under any circumstance, show emotions at work. Zero emotions are important for Leaders!
You’ve heard the adage: don’t let them see you sweat. Similarly, we learn, don’t let them see you angry, don’t lose it and certainly don’t ever cry. Perhaps a few “good” emotions are ok, but only in moderation. Heaven forbid we are called soft. Does this sound familiar?
We all have emotions
We cannot stop feeling. In truth, we do feel angry on occasions. Sometimes we are embarrassed, annoyed, frustrated, irritated, or feel hurt. At other times, we are excited, overjoyed or thrilled. Then there are the times we feel frazzled, overwhelmed or panicked. In any given day we could have hundreds of feelings pass through us.
These moods, sensations and thoughts impact our work
Most of us have been trained to push those emotions down. Perhaps not consciously, but subconsciously we’ve learned to set aside how we are feeling and just get the job done. We’ve been trained not to show what we are feeling.
We put fake smiles. We armor up with a mask to prevent people from seeing what’s going on inside. We push down the rage, the sadness, and the fear.
We can't hide emotions
Nevertheless, our emotions are often as plain as the nose on our face. The way we feel oozes out of us. Our anger seeps out. Our rage drips through the sarcasm in our voice. The irritation is visible in her eyebrow raises and our audible sighs. Everyone around us clearly knows we have feelings; the challenge is that we are not clearly expressing our emotions.
You need a higher EI (Emotional Intelligence)
Emotional intelligence is not only becoming more aware of your emotions but managing your emotions. It is the managing part that is extremely critical in leadership. But it starts with awareness. You need to know when your buttons are pushed and catch yourself before you react.
Awareness prevents knee-jerk reactions
It all starts with being aware of your emotions
To be aware of your feelings means that you:
Your assignment then is to start with working on increasing your awareness of your emotion
Emotions aren’t bad or wrong
Emotions are necessary. It’s important to become aware of your emotions and manage your emotions within your work environment and in life. Next week I will talk more about the managing part but for this week simply focus on becoming more aware of what is you’re feeling at any given moment.
Rid your old thoughts
Remember emotions aren’t bad or wrong. They are necessary. It’s important to become aware of your emotions and manage your emotions within your work environment and in life. Next week I will talk more about the managing part but for this week simply focus on becoming more aware of what is you’re feeling at any given moment.
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Women leaders often hit a point where they find themselves in over their heads and wondering if they have what it takes to lead.