I did not want to be known for this!

Do you secretly love getting gifts as much as I do? Just little things, like a note from my granddaughter, a book from a friend or flowers from my daughter. These are little surprises that warm my heart.

I received a special gift!
You can then see how, when my boss showed up one day at my office with a gift for me, I was a little excited. I always felt like he didn't really appreciate me or notice me. To get a gift perhaps meant I'd done something worthy of standing out 

You can imagine my surprise when I reached into the gift bag and felt....Ooooh, perhaps a mug! Oh, I do love mugs  The excitement was building, although I tried to temper it. One shouldn't seem too eager right?

I pulled off the tissue paper and discovered it was indeed a mug. However, the smile of anticipation quickly slid off my face. I tried to smile, but I'm sure it was clear that the gift hurt my feelings.

Would this gift annoy you?
The inscription on the mug read: Pessimists Mug on one side. The opposite side had a line indicating "The glass is half empty now."

That mug sat on my bookshelf for a long time. It annoyed the crap out of me each time I looked at it  I DID NOT want to be seen as a pessimist: A person who habitually sees or anticipates the worst or is disposed to be gloomy. The last thing I wanted was to be considered the team party pooper!

I set out to change that.
In my journal a short time later I wrote:

• Sept 27, 2005 - It’s so important to be optimistic instead of pessimistic - I always think of that cup my boss got me - He thought I was a pessimist. NO WAY! I am a realist that looks at things positively. I always pull out how things are and where we could be. I see the big picture, have hopes, dreams and goals. (This was followed by a list of things I was grateful for including a good job and my skills & abilities)

It must have worked because fast forward a couple of years, and that same boss didn't say I was optimistic, but he did write this about me:

• May 2007 - Kathy has worked on her inner self, and I can see this every time I talk with or see Kathy. Her confidence, inner security and calmness shine out from inside her. Kathy radiates her inner assurance to others, and this is a quality that is quite remarkable. 

That note was a gift I could be proud of!

Which way do you see me?
Fast forward a few more years...this week to be precise and our annual awards banquet at Toastmasters. I received an award for “Enduring Optimism” Yeah! THAT is the impact I want to have on others.

None of this happened by accident. I created a plan. I began reading books that helped with my attitude, outlook and view of myself and the world. I took training that helped me see problems from new perspectives. I journaled and started a gratitude practice.

I became Response-ABLE!

• I did not wait for someone else to change, my work world to change or the environment I lived in to change.
• I didn't hope someone would tell me what to do; What course to take, what book to read or what activity to engage in. I sought those out myself.
• I didn't wait for it to be the right time to take that journey of discovery and growth. I jumped in with both feet. Even my boss recognized that. He commented in the note about me: This is not easy when you are a working mom, raising a family and going to school. 

I stopped playing victim to the world around me and my circumstances and took responsibility for my life.

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Learn more about becoming Response-Able here

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What is holding you back?
What have you been waiting for? Someone to give you permission, or pay for your training? Have you been waiting for the right time? You need to stop waiting and become response-able! You can respond and change what you don't like about yourself, your work or your world. You must decide though and begin taking steps.

​I set out to change myself in many ways. I completed my degree, lost weight and developed leadership skills. But the thing I am most proud of is becoming the TYPE of person I want to be. I want to be a positive influence in the world, in your life and in mine. That started when I decided to work on my character traits. It's a journey I continue to this day.

Do want to work on your character traits as well?
To understand more about character development and how you can shape yours read this blog and watch this interview series from other women leader's who are working at it as well!

You must do the inner work! That is truly what will make a difference in your life and your leadership!