Listen to how this leader coaches her staff effectively and how you can too!

I'm guessing you have on a pair of heels, dress shoes or casual shoes...at least if you are reading this during your workday. On a typical workday for me, I spend the majority of it in slippers  I switch to runners...then back to slippers.
The exception is when you see me face-to-face at a speaking event, I'm rockin the heels! ​

Recently I needed a new pair of inside runners.
I headed down to the local store and spied this cute pair of polka-dot ones! I grabbed size 7 off the shelf, expecting to ensure they fit and be quickly on my way. They were tight. Too tight!
I tried on a pair of 8's, and they fit just fine. I was hesitant, though. Really? I'm usually a size 7. I wandered around the store with the 8's on just to be sure. In the end, I brought them home and love them!
Just right! 
Putting my feet into the size 7 and finding them too small was feedback. If the lady at the store had looked at me when I walked in and said here's a size 8, no need to try them on, I would have thought she was nuts! It was my own feeling that helped me choose the larger size.

Feedback and constructive criticism are not the same!
Feedback is a critical part of learning and growing, yet so often missed as we develop ourselves and our teams. Far too often, feedback is really constructive criticism!

Constructive Criticism is a scam run by people who want to beat you up.
And they want you to believe they are doing it for your own good!
Cheri Huber - There is Nothing Wrong With You

Ouch! How true is that!

FEEDBACK is an ART
Feedback instead is the art of pulling out the best in people so that they may become even better! It is giving them information they can work with. But when feedback is primarily presented as constructive criticism or advice-giving, it doesn't make the person feel good or inspire them to reach inside to be their best. It often puts them on the defensive and sadly often shut down.

3 Strategies for giving effective feedback
If you want to give feedback that grows and develops your staff in a way that is motivating and inspiring, try these 3 strategies.

1. Get curious
Instead of fixing, solving and giving advice, get curious about the person, and where they are heading.
Ask yourself:

• What do I want to see more of in them?
• What are they already doing that is similar to that or where are they already doing that?

2. Ask questions
Don't begin by telling them what to do, what they need to fix, and how they should do it. Instead, ask them questions that help them to provide their own feedback.
➡️Please don't ask: So do you know where you screwed up? 🥺
Try these questions:

• What worked well for you in this situation?
• What challenges did you discover?
• What ideas have you come up with for addressing those challenges?
• What new ideas might work?

COACHING IS...
By the way, this kind of feedback is coaching! Coaching is different than supervision, which is often about direction giving, fixing and solving. Coaching starts with inquiry, curiosity and questions.

3. Give positive feedback
Tell them about a time when you noticed they used a strength to solve their problem, handle a tough situation or figure something out.

An Example of giving feedback via COACHING in action
The story
Rebecca comes to you because she's short-staffed for the group home this weekend. She wants your help to figure it out.

The initial self-reflection that is often missed by most leaders:

• What do I want to see more of in them?
  • I want to see her take more initiative in connecting with other Team Leaders to share casual staff✔️
• What are they already doing that is similar to that or where are they already doing that?
  • I've seen her work with the other team leaders to organize training✔️

The coaching conversation:
Ugh! I get it, Rebecca. This is an ongoing challenge for your group home, isn't it?
Remember we were talking about it a few weeks back when Gary quit and Sasha was sick.

• Do you remember what worked well for you in then?
• What is the biggest hurdle you are having trouble with this time?
• What ideas have you come up with for working to cover the shifts?
• What are some new ways you might try to work through this?

You were quite resourceful last month when you were trying to get your basic training done for your team. You worked with the other team leaders to coordinate shifts and training schedules. That skill of resourcefulness is one that comes in quite handy as you lead in nonprofits.

• How might you use that skill today?

Sounds cool right! You can do this. It might take some practice, but you can transform the way you engage with your team into an inspiring and motivating conversation that helps your staff grow into their full potential. 

Do you want to get better at coaching your employees?
If you want some more help with this, join me for this month's webinar: Creating Comfortable Coaching Conversations. 

Ongoing training to grow women leaders in ​🇨🇦 Canada's Nonprofit Organizations.
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