Sinking? Stuck? Isolated? Ask for Help: 3 Places to Look

​Having the determination, persistence and perseverance to stick to doing the work that matters, to fight for what we believe in and to stick it out for the long haul can be gratifying and grueling.

Staying the course when you:

• get flack from others
• make a mistake
• feel afraid
• experience challenges or
• find yourself overwhelmed 

is a tough road, especially by when you try and do it on your own.

Do you know that you don’t have to do it alone right? 
Having someone alongside you to help you get through this, is precisely what you need.

But I'm supposed to be independent
​We were taught independence from the time we were little. You can do it. We learned asking for help was a sign of weakness. Oh, you can’t do it? There is a sense of failure if we have to ask for help. 

While there is truth in that some things need doing alone, there is also great wisdom in knowing when to ask for help.

​Signs it’s time to ask for help:

• You’ve tried, many times and can’t seem to figure it out.
• You know what’s crucial, but you are getting discouraged or losing faith that you can figure it out on your own.
• You have been trying different things but to no avail You simply don’t know what else to try.
• You feel disconnected, lonely, and isolated
• You are fearful, unsure, or hesitant, and need some motivation to move through that.

​Places to ask for help
1)    A loyal friend or family member
Talk to someone close to you about your desire to grow, be stronger and more on purpose to what truly matters to you. Find someone who will come along side you as you get fired up to make some changes. When you find that person, it is like having your own cheerleader in your corner. 

I remember years ago, I was going through some challenges with staff at work. I was feeling discouraged about relationships, yet determined to work through it because I was committed to the work we were doing. My husband came home one day, sat me down on the coach and said, listen to this. The sounds of Enrique Iglesias filled our family room. As the tears slid down my face, I knew that my husband believed in me. He was there for me. He was my shoulder to cry on, but would also stand me back up, turn me around and send me back off to the office. He knew I was meant to do that work. 
The support and motivation that I get from Ernie are what has gotten and continues to get me a long way in my career.

​2)    Make developing Grit part of your performance plan at work
Talk to your boss, your manager or your HR person about what skills and traits you desire to grow. Ask for opportunities, training and support to develop this determination and commitment in yourself. You may choose to share only a part of it or much of it, depending on your trust level in your relationships with these individuals. But the truth is in most organizations your supervisor wants to see you develop and grow your skills. They will be willing to help in whatever way they can, you simply need to show initiative and ask.

When I began to work on my degree, I was the first one in the organization that committed fully to doing it. Following me, many others have since taken the same program I did and graduated from it. I applaud them for it. It wasn’t an easy track working full-time. When I decided this was what I wanted to do, I asked my boss to commit, not to the whole degree, but to one course at a time. Honestly, that was all I could commit to as well. But one by one, year after year, I kept plugging away at it (do you sense my grit here) because I knew it was necessary for my growth and my ability to make the desired impact I wanted on my teams and in my field. My organizations supported that and each year, it was part of my performance plan.

Click here and learn how to BUILD A PLAN to get out of survival mode!

​3)    Look for outside support and training.
Depending on how you’ve narrowed down what you need to work on, there are a vast array of things you can do to get outside support to grow you. Some of that, your organization may help with, others you may simply do on your own. Consider the following as some options:

1. Public speaking training – Toastmasters is one example of where you may get some supports in this area.
2. Counselling – Check out your Employee Assistance Program (EAP) if you have one. Sometimes you need to work through some personal stuff first.
3. Finding a mentor, coach or guide – Click here if you’d like to talk to me more about that. You can book a complimentary coaching session and find out what coaching can do for you.
4. Take an online course – Coursera is one of my favorite free places to look

It's time to develop your GRIT
​Developing your grittiness is critical in really doing meaningful work, finding balance and enjoying what you do more. I won’t lie though; it takes a lot of effort. You must be determined. You need to connect passionately with what is important to you. You must also be willing to work at it for a long time.

• Find out more abut what Grit is here
• Click here to learn why you need to develop your Grit
• Here is some information to help you develop a plan and set some goals to enhancing your Grit.
• This article will tell you how you can grow your Grit​

Grow your Grit
Spend time connecting to what’s important to you and find the motivation to stick with it, despite the setbacks and challenges you face. Get serious about it by developing a plan to help you and reach out for assistance to do that. It will be worth it, trust me!