Do you like to read? The ladies whom I recently finished a six-week Mastering Confidence book club with were a group of leaders who, readers or not, wanted increased confidence. They read the book and worked through additional exercises to build their confidence over the weeks.
At the end of the final session, I asked them to come up with three summary points of what they had learned. Here is what they came up with.
How to master your confidence in 3 steps:
Step # 1 - AWARENESS
Step one is to become aware that you need to build confidence in a particular area of your leadership.
Without awareness, you keep settling, putting up with and feeling uncomfortable. Increased awareness of what area you need to grow confidence in starts you on the journey.
Answering those questions gives you increased awareness.
Step # 2 - Pause and Ponder
The second step to increasing your confidence is to pause and become self-reflective because confidence is not about what other people think you can do. It's what you believe you are capable of.
You need to examine your thoughts, beliefs, emotions, values, and perspectives to shift your confidence. Therefore, the second step to building confidence is to change what you're thinking and experiencing inside you so that your behaviours change outside of you.
One of the reasons the book club members identified pausing as a critical step is that it starts the process of examining your thoughts. It's the first step of the Inner Guidance Cycle, which I teach in the book.
What do I believe about my capacity, competence and confidence levels?
Answering these questions will help you feel more competent, capable and lead with confidence.
Step # 3 - Build your support team
The ladies in the Mastering Confidence Book Club quickly realized how similar their challenges, stories and solutions were.
The final point that the Mastering Confidence book club members identified is that you need to create a support network. You are not the only one who has struggled or is struggling with your leadership. Leaning into others on the journey or who are a few steps ahead of where you are can be incredibly helpful in navigating the journey.
When you connect with others, you can share a human experience with many striking similarities and learn from each other.
When you create your support team, you will find confidence-building becomes easier.
BONUS Step - Teach what you learn
Watching these leaders grow over six weeks is a powerful experience for me.
I experienced a lack of confidence in my leadership multiple times in my career. As I learned and grew, I taught others. First, it was my team leads and my program managers. Now my students and coaching clients. As I teach confidence, I learn more about it, become more confident in new areas and expand my comfort zone.
Mastering Confidence is about the journey to mastery. Masters know they are never really masters. As I said in the book:
Mastering your confidence is a transformational journey. You will realize that, in many ways, there is no endpoint to your trip. You won't "get confidence" one day and be done.
Instead, you will continually strive to find this place.
Then, just when you think you have, you will find that something happens, and you lose balance, feeling unsure again. As you go along, you'll discover an inner process, the Inner Guidance Cycle, to keep you growing as you move forward and bouncing back each time you get knocked down.
Inside the book, you get access to a free course. You can join it now!
Join the free Mastering Confidence Course.
What makes a world of difference is when you turn around and teach what you know. Teaching others helps you grow even more, and your confidence builds exponentially.
When you find the answers to those questions, not only will you be helping someone else build their confidence, but you'll also be mastering yours!
📙 If you want additional help that, grab Mastering Confidence.
👭👫 If you'd like to build confidence in your leadership team and would like to do a six-week book club with your team, message me, and I will make the arrangements. It might be good to do before summer hits, and it might also be a great Summer experience for your team.
✏️ ☕️ If you want to join The Training Library and join us for the monthly Coffee at the Library calls, you can join here and find more details about the Zoom calls here.
You've got this!
Confidence for you and your team is yours!!! Become aware it's time, and then do work to make it happen!
p.s. When you grab Mastering Confidence: Discover your leadership potential by awakening your inner guidance system, you get access to a free online course!
Nonprofit work can be incredibly fulfilling and impactful, but it can also be exhausting, overwhelming, and lead to burnout. Burnout is a state of emotional, physical, and mental exhaustion that occurs when you feel overwhelmed, emotionally drained, and unable to meet constant demands. Sadly burnout is far too common in the nonprofit sector, where overwork and lack of resources are common challenges.
The problem is many of us continue to work through burnout, either not recognizing it or not feeling we can take a step back to deal with it. That's not ok for you, your team, your clients, or your family, and it's certainly not ok for the nonprofit sector!
It's important to note that burnout is a gradual process and doesn't generally happen overnight. It's essential to pay attention to warning signs and take action before you hit burnout. Robert Cole, an American psychologist, wrote The Call of Service, which discusses the path to burnout.
The first step to prevent burnout is to increase your awareness of what it is and recognize the warning signs of when you might be headed there.
According to Cole, we move from weariness to cynicism. Next comes despair and, following that, bitterness. We then slip into depression before we hit burnout.
I remember the first time I was on antidepressants. It was right before I almost quit my job. I'd hit burnout and had trouble even remembering what I'd once loved about the work. I'd become so embroiled in conflict, toxicity and negativity.
Looking back, I now see that the weariness, cynicism, despair and bitterness were all there before that. I just tuned them out, assumed black humour was part of the job, and every leader is exhausted. I didn't know that those were not the mark of strong leadership. Instead, they were signposts along the way to burnout.
Look at the following stages on Cole's pathway to burnout. Do any of these sound a bit too familiar to your daily experience?
If so, stop and acknowledge that. Just pause and be aware that while this may seem "normal" in our sector, that doesn't make it "right." It's not ok, either. There is another way. It begins with choosing a different path.
I want to insert the original version of the serenity prayer here.
Father, give us courage to change what must be altered, serenity to accept what cannot be helped, and the insight to know the one from the other.
Notice that the prayer asked for courage first. And that courage was for things that MUST be changed, not things that simply can be changed. I believe we MUST change how we experience leadership in the nonprofit sector. But there is another way, and it will take courage from you, me, and a few other brave souls to start the tides of that change.
When I was aware I was burning out, I went to the doctor, who prescribed antidepressants. That isn't the path for everyone, and I don't know if I'd take that path again now. But it was the best I could do at the time.
I also did several things that boosted my confidence (You can find 4 of those confidence boosters here). The confidence boost helped me return to leadership with my head held high and ready to reengage intentionally and with passion.
It started with awareness, then took courage.
If you are on the path to burnout and want to rekindle your passion for nonprofit work, you might be interested in the 5-day challenge I created to help you rediscover your passion and purpose in your work.
Join the 5-Day Challenge: Conquer your love-hate relationship with your job.
March 20 - 24th
Are you tired of feeling stuck in a job that no longer excites you? Join the upcoming 5-day challenge and shift your mindset to reignite your passion for your nonprofit leadership role.
It's time to shift your mindset and reignite your passion for your job.
How it works:
When you sign up, you'll be invited to join each day to gradually make shifts that will rekindle your passion for your job.
Do you ever try to give appreciation to your employees and feel sometimes it falls flat? Have you ever wondered why you bother, what you are doing wrong or if it is even working?
You aren't alone! Many leaders attempt to give appreciation but miss the mark leaving both them and the employee wondering, "What the heck was that?"
You: Thanks for helping me out with that project.
🤨 You in your head: That's it! Just sure. It doesn't even seem like you heard what I said!
You: Take the afternoon off. You deserve it!
Them: Nah, I've got lots to do. I'd rather get it done.
🤨 You in your head: Um...Does a whole afternoon off not sound good to you?
You: I wanted to acknowledge the work you've all put in over the last few months. Here's a mug and t-shirt!
Them: Later, you hear two staff mumbling in the coffee room; A stupid mug and a t-shirt I'll never wear!
🤨 You in your head: Really! How ungrateful!
Why bother with recognition?
It's no wonder many leaders throw their hands up and wonder why bother. Yet we know that when employee recognition hits the mark, employees are:
Given we are struggling to get and keep good employees who don't burn out, the stats are worth looking at! And it would behoove us to consider what we need to do to get employee recognition to stick!
No, but we do need to speak their appreciation language
Gary Chapman and Paul White wrote The 5 Languages Of Appreciation In The Workplace: Empowering Organizations by Encouraging People. This was a follow-up to Chapman's best-selling book The 5 Love Languages. In The 5 Languages Of Appreciation In The Workplace, leaders and coworkers learn to understand each other by speaking each other's appreciation language. When you learn t do this, you' will also learn to make appreciation stick!
The 5 languages of appreciation in the workplace
Here's a summary of the 5 languages of appreciation in the workplace:
And it needs to stick
If you're offering recognition or appreciation in a way that doesn't land for an employee, you're not making them feel appreciated; instead, you might actually be turning them off.
For example, if you acknowledge someone at a staff meeting for their work, and they don't like a public announcement, they may be annoyed, embarrassed, and hope you never do it again. On the other hand, that same person might've appreciated you coming into the office, sitting for five minutes and spending quality time with them.
Therefore, it would help to learn and use the languages of appreciation. However, as I said in this post, 5 Keys to Meaningful Employee Recognition appreciation isn't just your job. There is no way you have the time, the resources, or the capacity to do this all by yourself. That's a heavy burden to take on and one that you will not have the time for.
Also, when we encourage peer-to-peer recognition and appreciation, there is increased collaboration, and stronger peer-to-peer relationships are built. Your employees will communicate more effectively, get along better, and they're going to support each other, especially in those crisis moments.
How to use the book The 5 Languages Of Appreciation in the workplace to create a culture of recognition
So, how could you use the book The 5 Languages Of Appreciation In The Workplace to create a culture of recognition? Here are four suggestions:
1 - Identify everyone's language of appreciation
Clear up miscommunication by communicating appreciation in languages you all understand. That starts with identifying everyone's language of appreciation.
Give your team members access to the assessment that helps them identify their preferred language of appreciation. This could help them understand how they prefer to be appreciated and also help them recognize the preferences of their colleagues.
Language of Appreciation Assessment
You could purchase an assessment for each team member or buy a book for each, which has a code to complete the assessment so that everyone can identify their language of appreciation.
2 - Start a book club
You could suggest the team read The 5 Languages of Appreciation in the Workplace as a group and discuss the concepts presented in the book. Then, you and your team could meet once every two weeks for a couple of months to discuss the book and share ideas on implementing the concepts presented in their work environment.
3 - Train your team
You could read and study the book and use the book as a basis for a training session or workshop for your team. You'd want to cover the different languages of appreciation, how to identify them in team members, and how to use them to create a culture of recognition.
4 - Give them the tools to appreciate each other with the 5 languages
You could encourage peer recognition by providing team members with the tools they need to identify the languages of appreciation in their colleagues.
These tools can help team members understand and use the various languages of appreciation in the workplace and create a culture of recognition and appreciation that can improve team morale and productivity.
It's important to note that everyone has a preferred language of appreciation and that not all languages of appreciation will be equally effective for every person. The key is to identify each team member's preferred language of appreciation and use it regularly to create a culture of recognition and appreciation in the workplace.
From Guilty to Empowered: Overcoming the Guilt of Taking a Sick Day in Nonprofit Leadership
Last week, I came down with a nasty case of the Norovirus and yet...
How can I take time off?
My first thought was: I've just got to get through this, and then I can get to work.
My second thought was: I'll just pretend I'm OK. I won't let anyone know I'm sick.
My third thought was: Did you just think that?
Is that the kind of person I want to be when my body clearly tells me I should not be at my computer? I will pretend I'm OK and not let on that I'm about ready to fall over. Seriously? I can barely walk from room to room, and I can't stay awake for more than an hour, and I'm going to pretend I'm OK?
That realization quickly urged me to clear my day's schedule and let myself be sick! Sometimes it's "easy" to decide that. However, at other times, taking time off because you are sick isn't always such a clear choice.
👉 As leaders, we can't always take a sick day when were are not feeling our best. Sometimes you must work with a headache. Sadly, you can't always stay home when your menstrual cramps are killing you. And if we all took time off when we had the sniffles, work would never get done.
So how do you know when it's OK to take time off and when it's not?
1️⃣ First, you need to pause, stop and perhaps sit down.
2️⃣ Then with intention, ponder your dilemma. You won't make your best decision with unconscious thoughts whirling in your head.
Let's go through some considerations, and I'll provide you with questions you can mull over to help you make a decision you'll feel better about.
🤔 What kind of workplace culture are you creating?
The obvious question is, are you contagious? But we all know that even that won't stop many of us from working. Instead, we'll rationalize it to either I'm working at home, I'll keep my distance, or they've probably already been infected.
But what if you took that question a step further?
Does that change your perspective a wee bit?
What's the impact of your taking time off?
Leaders carry different responsibilities that often have a trickle-down or ripple-up effect. Your work, or lack of it, can impact others. And by work, I don't simply mean returning emails and attending meetings. But more so, it's your decision-making skills, problem-solving abilities, accountability responsibilities and resource delegation roles.
By taking sick time off, you may prevent things from happening, create a bottleneck or further complicate issues. Your absence could mean missed deadlines, loss of funding or risk of failing to meet contractual obligations.
All that is not to make you feel guilty. You already know this. That's why I say it. Worrying about this in the background only creates guilt and anxiety and may cause you to work when you really shouldn't.
So what to do? Again, I'll encourage you to pause. Stop and sit down without your laptop and phone for a few minutes, then ponder. Consider the following questions.
❓ Would my absence cause significant disruption to my team or clients?
❓ Have I ensured my team has the resources and support they need to continue working effectively in my absence, such as clear instructions, updated contact lists, and access to necessary technology?
❓Do I have any important deadlines or projects that could be impacted by taking a day off, and if so, have I made arrangements to mitigate any potential setbacks?
❓ Would my absence create excess workload, pressure or morale issues for my team or organization?
❓ What needs to be reorganized?
You're entitled to sick leave. Taking time off when unwell is not something to feel guilty about. The more intention you put into creating a plan for your absence, the easier it will be to let go and take care of yourself.
🤔 Are you risking burning out if you don't take care of yourself?
As a nonprofit leader, your work is incredibly important, and you're likely passionate about the cause you're working to advance. However, there are times when it's important to take a step back and prioritize your own well-being before it's too late!
What makes it so hard to make a choice to look after me?
If you are feeling unwell and you think taking a day off would help you recover more quickly, it may be worth taking a sick day. Taking care of yourself and getting the rest you need can help prevent your illness from worsening and help you feel better faster.
🤔 What about your family?
When illness hits, it often hits an entire household. So while you need to consider your work responsibilities, you must also consider what's happening at home. Gallup's research has found that members of strong teams are as committed to their personal lives as they are to their work. That means when their families need them, they are passionate about being there for their families. You are a better leader when you do.
Ideas for using the questions:
While you probably aren't going to review this entire list every time you get sick, it is a place to come back to on occasion to ensure you are being your best self and, thus, the most positively impactful leader you can be.
As a nonprofit leader, your work is important, but so is your health and well-being. By using this framework to help you decide when to take a sick day and keep these reminders in mind, you'll be better equipped to care for yourself and continue making a difference in the world.
Staff recognition and appreciation are important. How important?
Well, let's say essential.
When staff recognition hits the mark (according to Gallup), employees are 73% less likely to "always" or "very often" feel burned out.
When staff recognition hits the mark (again, according to Gallup), employees are 56% less likely to be looking or watching for job opportunities.
For employee recognition to be effective, it has to land. In the stats above, Gallup said: When it hits the mark...
Sometimes, what we think of as good recognition, isn't landing in the way we intend it to.
Let me ask you...
I'm guessing you said yes to at least one of those, so you know what it feels like when recognition doesn't land. It doesn't feel so great.
So, how do you make your employee recognition stick? Let's look at 5 considerations that will help!
5 things that can make employee recognition land and feel good to the employee:
Timeliness: Recognize the employee after their achievement or contribution as soon as possible so they feel their efforts are valued and appreciated.
Hey Sarah, thanks for staying late and helping clean up. It's been a long day for all of us, and I appreciate the extra help!
Specificity: Be clear about the specific behaviour, action, or contribution you recognize the employee for, so they understand what they did well and can continue to do so in the future.
The way you handled that guardian was impressive, Lindsey. They were argumentative, and I noticed you kept your body posture open. You remained curious and asked lots of questions when it would have been easy to get defensive. As a result, I watched the situation settle down. It was impressive to see you apply the skills you learned in your conflict resolution course.
Sincerity: Be genuine in your recognition and communicate your appreciation in a way that feels authentic and heartfelt.
There is no example here, but genuineness isn't what you say. It's how you say it. It's a feeling, and you have to feel it before they will feel it!
Personalization: Tailor the recognition of the individual's preferences and needs to feel personalized and relevant to them.
I so appreciate everyone's contribution to the move of offices. It was a lot of work. So I wanted to give everyone a small token of thanks!
Sasha - Get yourself your favourite drink at Starbucks (gift certificate)
Beca - I know you are looking for the right thing to put on your office wall. I hope this will help you find that (Gift certificate to Homesense)
Ben - I know you used a lot of sticky notes labelling stuff getting moved. Make sure to head to Staples to grab some of your favourite coloured ones.
Follow-up: Follow up with the employee to reinforce the behaviour or contribution that was recognized and encourage continued success. You won't know if it landed if you don't ask.
Hey Saba, you put extra effort into that preparing for the review. I know I acknowledged that at the staff meeting. I'm curious, though, what's your preferred way to be recognized? Do you like it in public, or would you rather I mention it privately?
When staff recognition lands, it sticks. That stickiness makes it linger, feel good and keeps people engaged, around and more vibrant. I want to make sure you learn how to do that! So this month, I'll release a new course in The Training Library called Staff Recognition That Sticks.
In Staff Recognition That Sticks, I'll walk you through the employee recognition and engagement connection. It's essential to understand how vital frequent and genuine recognition impacts your employees' engagement.
You will also learn how to give timely, specific, sincere, personalized, effective, and sticky recognition and achievement. Finally, you'll discover how to create a culture of recognition where it becomes second nature for everyone to acknowledge and recognize each other.
If you've written down your nonprofit leadership goals, congratulations. Many never even get to that point. If you are one of the leaders determined to grow this year, you've also devised a plan to accomplish those goals. Now what? Now, you need to take action, and you need to keep taking action throughout the year!
But rather than steadily moving towards your goal, if you aren't careful, you'll join the 80% of people who abandon their goals by February.
What, then, is the trick to sticking to your goals? Instead of floundering, forgetting and failing - you successfully achieve your goals by reviewing them regularly.
Build a systematic review process
Positive thinking, believing you can achieve your goal, is the first step. However, positive thinking alone does not equal success. You actually have to do something!
Habitually reviewing where you are on your journey as you progress toward your goal will make you more successful. Being determined, even though adversity will always hit, is how you achieve your goals and become a strong leader.
Review your strategy for achieving your goals
The actions you take on the journey to achieve your goals make a difference. However, it's consistently taking action that is the hard part. In truth, many of the steps you need to take to achieve your goals won't be easy or enjoyable. That is precisely why many people don't achieve their goals. They stop when it gets tough or they come up against a barrier.
Remember that adversity strengthens you
Here is the thing, though, you NEED those roadblocks! The difficult parts are the essential parts. By going through the struggle, we learn, grow and become better versions of ourselves. It is during the challenges that we become better leaders. Therefore, getting through the trying segments of the journey is necessary for reaching the goal.
The truth is for you to get to the next step:
You need to learn something
You must increase skills in some area
You are required to come to a new awareness
This more difficult part of goal attainment is the portion that many of us resist but, sadly, it is also the part that will keep you stuck and unhappy.
Your plan keeps you moving
To keep moving forward when challenges hit, you must have a plan that includes
Your plan might incorporate coursework
You must keep reviewing your plan
Once your strategy is in place, you must regularly review that plan. That way, when you hit a roadblock, feel overwhelmed or want to quit, you can reconnect to your goal and strategies to get over the hump. In addition, reviewing your plan will remind you of what you can do if you feel overwhelmed, confused, apprehensive or stuck.
Make the review time effective
Create a habit of reviewing your goals to make the review time effective. The following steps give you a process for the weekly review of your goals and your strategic plan to achieve those goals:
The 10-minute framework for your weekly review
Each week, set aside 10 to 30 minutes to review your goals and the plan you have for achieving them. During this time, create the habit of doing the following:
1. Write out your goals
Don't just read them over. Rewrite them. Writing your goals down creates new pathways in your mind that activate the desire to achieve your goals. It keeps them alive and real.
2. Visualize achieving your goals
Close your eyes and imagine what it will be like when you reach your goal. Connect emotionally and viscerally to it. Feel the excitement, pride, and sense of accomplishment. Let your tummy get jumbly, and your heart swell and your eyes water.
3. Identify the overarching steps needed to achieve your goals
Remind yourself of the steps you identified in your strategic plan that you need to take to achieve your goal.
4. Visualize yourself moving through the steps
Close your eyes and see yourself navigating the steps you need to achieve goal attainment. As you do, notice challenges that may pop up and envision yourself overcoming them. Then, as you see yourself moving towards your goal, notice what it takes for you to progress through the difficult times. It may be your determination, increased patience or ongoing persistence.
5. Identify the next step you need to take
As you review your plan each week, identify what you need to work on to keep moving towards your goals.
Next, write that action step down.
Then, schedule it in your day timer and commit to doing it.
The ongoing review will help you achieve your goals!
To be a better version of yourself this year and, thus, a better leader, you need to set goals. Then, you must have a strategy and a plan for how you will achieve those goals. But from there, the next crucial step is regularly reviewing your goals and plans. Creating the habit of regularly reviewing your goals will help you be the best leader you can be.
If you want to make this year different, then you've likely set goals for yourself, and if you're serious, you've probably created a plan for how you will reach those goals. The Next Step? It's to measure your progress.
But how do you measure goals that seem immeasurable? 🤷♀️
These 3 tips can help you 👇🏻
Measure the use of the TOOL
Think about what you will use to help you reach your goal. Get clear on how you will use that tool. Then measure the usage of that tool. For example
GOAL: Be better able to focus on important but not urgent work
GOAL: To feel more confident in staff meetings
GOAL: To spend more time doing strategic thinking
Measure the HABIT you need to instill to help you reach your target.
If your goal this year is a more work-life balance, habitually leaving work on time will provide more balance. Therefore, you could measure how often you leave work at five o'clock.
To feel more confident in staff meetings, you'll need to be more intentional before going into staff meetings. Choosing how you will respond instead of reacting to a trigger needs to become a habit before meetings. Therefore, you'll measure how often you preplan how you'll manage your emotions during the meeting. Is it becoming a habit that you naturally do?
When you find yourself stuck on a problem, you've likely been trying to figure it out in a linear, analytical or in-the-box way. Instead, you may need to think more freely, creatively, or strategically. When you create the habit of scheduling "thinking" time into your week, you'll be on your way to finding more time to think. Count the times you do it. Has it become a weekly habit yet?
Measure the MILESTONES along the journey to the goal
Completion of goals takes time and often involves many steps. However, we feel more engaged in our goals when we can see progress along the way. Therefore, checking off each milestone along the way is a way to measure progress.
Did you pick which app you'll meditate with?
Did you find a journal or scribbler to write down your thoughts in?
Did you do your first walk to think, despite feeling guilty about all the work you were walking away from?
You can't manage what you don't measure says Peter Druker
You'll need to measure your progress regularly to help you achieve your goals this year. To help you do that...
Review this regularly, and you'll FEEL the difference!
No goals yet for this year? It's not too late
It is the third week in January already, and perhaps you are one of the ones who have yet to set your goals for the year. I have many clients in your shoes. They need to find the time to draft their goals but are struggling. But rest assured. It is not too late to set them. Now that the dust of the holidays has settled, you may be in a better place to do that.
Setting goals is essential to leading a nonprofit organization but also essential to the development of your capacity to lead. Yet, it can be challenging to find the time and focus on doing so amidst the busyness of day-to-day operations. Below you'll find easy strategies to help you develop goals that will build your competence and confidence as a leader this year.
You do need goals
First, let's get clear. You do need goals. As teleological beings, we perform at our best when we have targets to work towards. You know this if you say you do your best work at the last minute. A looming due date is a fabulous target to motivate most of us.
Without goals, you wander in circles
Without goals, we can quickly feel like we are just going through the motions and not making progress. Without targets, you are wandering aimlessly. That is why you may feel like you are just going in circles!
With goals, you are intentionally creating your leadership experience
Are you taking an active role in shaping your future? You are if you are intentionally creating life, days, your career and your personal life as you choose.
When you are intentional, you create your leadership and life experiences by reflecting, deciding, setting goals and planning, all before you take action.
The easy goal-setting method
Whenever anything comes to mind about your goals, jot it down on a sticky note or digital file. Your brain is always thinking, and you have ideas, awarenesses and ah-has. Those are important to capture.
Schedule time to review last year
As little time as 5 minutes will do. Begin by reviewing the past year and reflecting on your strengths, areas of growth, and accomplishment. Here are some prompts to get you started:
Create a future vision
Knowing where you are going will help you get there. It would help if you had that target to aim at. Craft a quick vision of what you want in your future by answering these questions:
If I have the "perfect" life, career and relationship:
EXTRA HELP: Most nonprofit leaders miss this step critical step when setting goals
Rough out your goals
Consider the steps you need to take this year to move closer to that vision. Draft 2-3 goals to help you achieve that vision. They don't need to be perfect, SMART or finalized. Draft is the important word here. You'll continue to refine them as you work on them. Just get something down on paper as a starting point.
Expand the goal into a plan
Once you have your goals, develop a plan to achieve them, including specific actions, practices, and training.
Consider what habits you need to develop to maintain your goals over the long term.
EXTRA HELP: Create your plan to ditch "Survival Mode"
An example of how it works:
Perhaps you imagined yourself as a courageous leader. You visualized how you are stronger, more assertive and more confident. You got a sense that as you grew, you could feel yourself doing tough things like addressing issues, setting boundaries and being true to yourself.
Your goal could be to increase your confidence level in your leadership role.
Your plan could include:
The bottom line
Taking the time to set goals and create a plan to achieve them intentionally can significantly impact the success of your leadership and personal life. By being intentional and self-reflective, you can progress toward your desired experience of blending life and career. Regardless of the time of year, it's always possible to start creating the future you want.
Creating goals for yourself allows you to find a different experience in life. Rather than letting your days unfold before you and reacting to whatever fire flares up, you need to design your experience of leadership and life. Creating a plan to go with your goals will make your life more enjoyable.
The Components of Effective Goals
As you design your goals for the coming year, include the following three components.
PART # 1 - The Outcome You Desire
First is the part of the goals that most people set. It is the outer part of the goal because they are outside of you. It often happens in the outside world that you can see or touch when you reach your goal. You can point to them and say I did that!
PART # 2 - The Internal Shift You Need to Make
The next part of the goal is the internal shift. To succeed at reaching your goal, you often need a change inside you. It is connected to your thoughts and emotions and often includes a degree of inner discipline.
Examples of internal shifts
PART # 3 - What habit do you need to cultivate?
The final part of a good plan to achieve your goals is clarifying the habits you'll need to cultivate to achieve your goals. The difference between a habit and a goal is:
Examples of habits
When you include all three components, you develop a well-rounded plan to work on and regularly review to ensure you are on track. Let's work through some examples to help make sense of how you can apply this in your nonprofit role.
Task-related goals examples:
Outcome – Complete a review of the policy manual.
Inner shift - A policy manual is not a thing. It's how we do our work.
Habit to cultivate – Have staff rotate a review of policies at each staff meeting, sharing examples of how they applied policy, reviewed the policy or identified the need for revisions,
Outcome – Create a new hire experience we follow each time we hire a new employee.
Inner shift - Shifting thoughts to: Our work is never done. We have to create systems to help us with cycles.
Habit to cultivate – Review the new employee routine every six months to see what's working and what we can improve on.
Individual Leadership Goals Examples:
Outcome – Leave the office at 5 pm daily
Internal Shift - Shifting my thoughts to "It's ok for me to leave at 5 pm," which will create an increased feeling of work-life balance
Habits to cultivate
Outcome – Develop An Attitude of Gratitude
If you are cultivating gratitude, you may think the goal is to write in a gratitude journal daily. That will help, but there are other things to do. For example, many people write down a list of things they are grateful for and wonder why it doesn't change their life.
The Inner Shift - To truly cultivate an attitude of gratitude, you need to slow the process down and connect emotionally with the thing you are recording. Gratitude is a feeling, not a doing. You FEEL grateful. You don't DO grateful. Therefore to achieve this goal, you need to understand what it feels like in your body when you are grateful and then "do" more to cultivate that feeling. That's an internal shift.
Habit to cultivate – Taking a deep breath after you've written your grateful statement, closing your eyes, reliving the situation you are thankful for, and feeling it in your body again.
For my members of The Training Library, you'll find a lesson and worksheet on gratitude here.
Outcome - Get better at setting boundaires
Learning to say no more often may be about setting boundaries with those around you regarding what you will and will not do. Often just setting limits creates more stress in a person's life. A true shift in setting boundaries is understanding why you have the urge to say yes in the first place. That's an internal shift.
The Inner Shift - Boundary setting requires self-discipline. You need to resist that urge to please everyone around you. To feel good about the boundaries you set requires you to change the inner dialogue that insists you "must" respond or:
The habit to cultivate - To be more comfortable setting boundaries, you may need to create a habit of self-reflection. Each week, take time first to write down the boundary you want to make. Then consider what thoughts come up when you set that limit and what beliefs and values play a role. That will help you begin to make the inner shift.
To create your highly successful goals this year:
You need to do more than write a goal statement down. As you set your goals for the year, think about the type of leader you want to be and the impact you want to have on your team, organization, and industry. Also, consider how you want to integrate work and life. Then create goals that will help you be that type of leader with the experience of leadership and life you desire.
Successful goal setting requires a plan
You will find success when you look at the goals you want to achieve as more than a statement. Take time to develop the outcome, the internal shift and the habits.
If you are like most nonprofit leaders, you hit the ground running this January.
It feels like we don't get to choose!
If you aren't careful, you'll default to spending this year chasing whatever falls onto your lap, your inbox or shows up at your door. But you can design your life this year rather than wait to see how it unfolds.
The problem is that too many women leaders in the nonprofit sector live in default mode. Whatever gets thrown at us, we take on. We are so mired in the tasks and meetings right in front of us we don't even see that we have a choice.
But you do have a choice
You can design your leadership and life experience with some planning, and you are worth the time it will take! Trust me!
Your indecision will leave you in default mode
If you don't plan, you live in default mode. Defaulting to others, lack of time, or the expectations set for you, means you don't decide. Your indecision means you give up the ability to create your days and how you want them to be.
Put together day after day of defaulting to the world, and this is what you will find:
I felt like I was a victim of my circumstances
I look back in my journals and see when I was in default mode. It's easy to tell. It was when I felt I was the victim. I blamed my mess of a life on others, the job, the sector, society and life in general. I gave up control.
Women fit their life around everyone else
In default mode, women wait to see what everyone else around them does. Then women try to fit their needs, wants, wishes and dreams into the tiny cracks in the middle. That is, if there are any cracks to be found. Unfortunately, most of us are so busy taking care of the things that need doing that we don't make time for ourselves.
Are you letting everyone else decide your life?
The problem is if you keep going down that path, you will never find what you want. If you don't set goals for yourself, someone else will set them for you. Your organization and your boss or board probably have goals set for you. I bet someone else has decided what you will do at work and in your personal life. You follow the beat of the drums around you. It's time to find your own beat!
Don't get me wrong, your organization should have goals, and in addition to those goals, you should design your own personal goals for your career and your life.
Stop letting everyone else decide. Create your vision
Designing your life means you step back and determine how you want to experience it. It means you choose what you want and then make that happen. That starts with deciding on a vision and then developing goals to reach that vision.
Take back your power by making choices
In design mode, you take back control. You take back your power and make choices. You become responsible for the choices and the outcomes of your life. When you do that, you ensure there are time, resources and motivation to reach your goals and dreams, whatever those are.
I gained my power back
I can also see in my journals where I took the time to set goals and the shifts it made in my moods and my day-to-day experiences.
Prepare to design your life:
Live life in design mode
Make a choice. Decide to take back control of your life. Start by taking control of your agenda and setting aside time to plan. You'll be glad you did!
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Women leaders often hit a point where they find themselves in over their heads and wondering if they have what it takes to lead.